Look hard enough...

...and you will find a flaw in everything.

Lately, man, lately I have seen multiple flaws in everyone. And I mean everyone, including myself. It seems as if the past few weeks have been a time of my eyes opening to the fact that people are flawed. Can I just say this before I go on: I HATE seeing flaws in people. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. There is nothing that I wouldn't choose over discovering another person's flaws.

No matter what, who, or why, every single day I have noticed flaws in at least one person. And it sucks majorly. So, now, I have to dissect why I expect certain people to meet certain standards, if they are meeting them, and what right or reason I have to be disappointed.

Man, I feel so heavy right now. I wish I had never seen the things I have this past month. And I don't know if it's God or what, but I know of no one in Tallahassee that has not let me down in some way this semester. And that makes me really sad. But again, why do I feel let down? What is my personal stake in their actions?

Another thing, I am not responding well to it. I have not yet learned how to process character and personality flaws while still interacting normally with the person. Their personal shortcomings affect me directly. I have not mastered letting my spirit take over when my mind is reeling from what just happened. I guess one day I'll get it down. Until then, I am amazed at how much I missed in the people around me.

*slightly distressed*

lexi